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What a day for Virtual Console fans. For one, we've got the ultra-aggressive coin-op classic, Ninja Gaiden, to check out. Then, on top of that, the game that spawned one of Nintendo's most beloved franchises: Super Smash Bros. for the N64. If that doesn't put a smile on your face, then you just may be one of the most depressed people on Earth. We suggest consulting a doctor.

• Super Smash Bros. (N64, 1-4 players, 1,000 Wii Points)
• Ninja Gaiden (Arcade, 1-2 players, 600 Wii Points)

North American Wii owners, the wait may soon be over. After years of patient, patient waiting -- and watching the game land on both the European and Japanese Virtual Console -- the original Smash Bros. should soon be winging its way to American Wiis. The evidence: The game has been rated for Wii by the ESRB, hopefully signifying that a release is imminent. In case you were wondering, the game received an E rating, ostensibly making it suitable for everyone.

We'll just have to wait and see how Grandma takes it when she gets a Star Rod to the dome.

Gamespot is reporting that Nintendo revealed to them that a few oft-requested classic titles will be added to the Virtual Console within the coming weeks. According to the report, the festivities will kick off this coming Monday, when Super Mario Kart (which has been available in Japan for approximately forever) will be added to the storefront for the standard price of 800 Wii Points ($8).

Later in the holiday season, Nintendo will also reportedly drop the original Pilotwings onto the platform, then shortly after that, will also toss Super Smash Bros. into the mix. No prices have been announced for these two titles, but according to the Gamespot article, both will be released by the end of the year. That's just great. It's not like we're already drowning in huge, time-draining blockbusters. Now we've got to start perfecting our drifting and shell-flinging once again. We appreciate the gesture, Nintendo -- but your timing is rotten.

We suspect that even if we started playing Sin & Punishment 2 now and kept playing until the North American release in spring of next year, we wouldn't be able to play with the kind of skill and confidence on display in this video of Stage 1. The player in this demonstration on Nintendo's site builds up a 16x multiplier immediately and hangs on to it throughout the level.

In more S&P2 news, Siliconera has been translating an Iwata Asks interview with Treasure, mostly about the development of the first game for Nintendo 64, a system that "didn't work at all."

It was with awkward trepidation that we first approached Comedy Central's Internet content-laden Tosh.0 -- working online all day can leave you feeling a bit strange when you find the same content in the TV box, ya know? But when we read over at GoNintendo that the exuberant comedian would be giving his famed "Web Redemption" treatment to the Internet's own "N64 kid," we couldn't help but get overexcited. We started pumping our fists in the air and shouting and ... well, you already know, don't you? The show will be airing this Thursday on Comedy Central, but check your local listings for the specifics.

Remember that Mushroom Kingdom mod DoritoClock was working on for Left 4 Dead? Well, he's making progress and now has some new areas of the campaign to show off: the exterior of Peach's Castle and Super Mario 64's first world, Bob-omb Battlefield. He even added the latter's Chain Chomp!

It seems DoritoClock has also been reading our diary, because he's compiled a 10+ minute video walkthrough of all the areas. You can find that video past the break, but if you're anxious to see that Chain Chomp munching on a few undead carcasses (like we are), prepare to be disappointed. It's a work in progress, folks.

Eager to show its disconnected patrons that their Wiis can do more than Wii Sports -- you don't even have to eject the disc! -- Nintendo has appointed pretty much anyone in Europe savvy enough to visit Wii's Connection Settings menu an "Ambassador." Here's how the "Connection Ambassador Promotion" works: Beginning in October (as seen in Japan), if you help another Wii owner establish an online connection, you and your incompetent friend will both receive five Nintendo bucks (500 Wii Points). (Presumably, when connecting for the first time, there will be an option to credit an Ambassador.)

And if you extend your services to the maximum of twenty previously offline console owners? You're looking at a 10,000-point payout ($100 worth of old games you probably have tucked away in cart form, plus all those WiiWare options) -- not bad, eh?

But wait! There's a more tempting perk to this promotion. As Ambassador, once you connect ten users, you'll achieve "gold status" and be free to download all first-party NES titles on Virtual Console. Oh, but it gets far better: Hit your twenty connections and -- you guessed it -- you've attained "platinum status," essentially granting you the keys to Nintendo's Virtual Console catalog. That's right, all first- and third-party NES, SNES and N64 games -- for free.

Quick! Google map the twenty nearest old folks homes and get ambassadoring!

Finally, the moment you've been waiting for since you lent your copy of Super Smash Bros. to someone who then moved away. If you're in Europe, tomorrow will be a very exciting Virtual Console day: the original Super Smash Bros. will be available for download, according to the Official Nintendo Magazine, for 1,000 points.

Surprisingly, Nintendo isn't taking the opportunity to be lazy and make it a one-game week. Cocoto Platform Jumper will also be up on WiiWare, and both Asphalt 4 and Sudoku 150 will be on DSiWare. We thought we'd mention these here, because they will not get any attention at all this week due to Smash Bros.

Next month, developer Komodo and distributor Innex will one-up (or two-up, we guess) RetroZone's RetroPort Wii controller adapters with their Retro Adapter. Instead of merely allowing you to use a NES or SNES controller with Virtual Console games, the Retro Adapter features ports for NES, SNES, and Nintendo 64 pads in one $20 device. The adapter, being released almost just in time for the release of Majora's Mask on the Virtual Console, purportedly supports true analog control for the N64 controller.

Innex will be demonstrating the product at E3, and we're going to do our best to get all those new games or whatever out of the way so we can spend some time with it.

This week, the Virtual Console finally gets Majora's Mask for the N64. Some people think Ocarina of Time is better, and some people don't. And some people probably never played either, which is something that should be addressed with one's person therapist or physician.

This week, NintendoWare Weekly brings us the second-most requested title for the Virtual Console: Majora's Mask. With its arrival today, that can only mean one thing: Earthbound is next! When is "next?" Well, yeah, that might be a problem ...

This week, we have another question about Nintendo Points, which, we realize as we do these Ask Joystiq Nintendo columns, are kind of weird. The points cards come in different values in different regions, and sometimes even have different costs across platforms! Weird.

Also, the usual sadness, this time about N64 games on VC and Front Mission 2089: Border of Madness. If you'd like us to give you reasons why your favorite game isn't being localized, send an email to asknintendo AT joystiq DOT com.

The original N64 version of Banjo-Tooie was met with near-universal critical acclaim, though some were disappointed by the cancellation of one of the title's most lauded additions -- a feature known as "Stop 'n' Swop," where special eggs located in Banjo-Kazooie could be imported into Tooie to exchange for various prizes.

Now, nearly a decade later, the feature has found its way into the XBLA re-release of Banjo-Tooie -- but this time around, the rewards are a tad more tangible. As seen in the video after the jump, an achievement, gamer pic and a Banjo-Kazooie NXE theme (as well as a few in-game cheats and items) are all up for grabs if you've got the mettle to go egg hunting in Banjo the First. And by "the mettle," we of course mean "the GameFAQs guide."

Collectors, listen up: One Nintendo-loving eBay user has dug through his/her Nintendo collection and decided to give up a few rare (and autographed) collectibles. Included in the auction are four gold and black N64 controllers (won during a Star Fox tournament) signed by legendary developer Shigeru Miyamoto and ex-Nintendo president Minoru Arakawa. The auction also includes a copy of Next Generation magazine signed by Miyamoto and Arakawa as well as former Nintendo executives Howard Lincoln, Peter Main and others.

It isn't the sexiest auction available but at $21.48 (as of press time) it may be the cheapest way to grab classic Nintendo autographs... or at least a half-dozen N64 controllers.

[Thanks, Charles P.]