Look folks, we'll admit it -- it's been kind of awhile since we had nagging overlords demanding we shut off the game system and finish our homework. We can, however, understand the plight of our younger readers, worried their elders may find out about the built-in parental controls on Xbox 360 and simply flip a switch rather than engage their kids in spirited debate. Unfortunately, you guys may be in a bit of trouble, as John Morrissey, a man in Edina, Mn. recently took it upon himself to assist in the neverending War on Fun by inventing a device specifically meant to limit time spent playing games on, well, any electricity-based device. It's called the "Video Game Timer" (distributed by Digital Innovations).

From the looks of the thing, you plug whatever electric device you'd like to limit access to into the VGT, set an amount of time, and that's that. Star Tribune says that the device emits "some warning beeps" before automatically shutting off the power, though we're wary of anything instantly cutting off the power to the games we're playing. If anything, the interaction between parent and child every time they want to play a game as a result of this will help to act as punishment for any parents out there thinking about purchasing such a game console chastity belt. For those parents out there trying to avoid such ... less than pleasant interactions with their kids, we humbly suggest the Entertainment Software Ratings Board.

If the uncharacteristic lack of over-the-top gore in Mortal Kombat vs. DC Universe was an issue for you, series co-creator Ed Boon has some good news for you. Now (very clearly) heading up development of the ninth MK game, the designer has been tweeting about its content, recently saying that, "People want an M-rated MK....dammit we will give them an M-rated MK."

Boon also addressed a tweet he received asking what it would take to make an AO-rated MK, saying, "I dont know where the line is to make MK an AO rated game. But we definitely dont want to kross it." "KROSS" it? Oh Ed, you krazy klown. That never gets old!

[Via IndustryGamers]

A few more discoveries were made today off the ESRB website. Looks like American PS3 owners will be able to download Buzz Jr. RoboJam off the PSN some time soon. The family friendly PSN game is a port of a PS2 game with the same name and has some of the easiest Trophies around. It'll require the Buzz! buzzers though, so many trophy hunters will be out of luck.

A new SingStar game has also been discovered on the ESRB. The SingStar Sampler Pack looks to be yet another expansion to the franchise, this time featuring David Bowie, Fergie, Amy Winehouse, Rockwell, and the Smashing Pumpkins.

Finally, long-lost PSN game topatoi looks like it may actually be coming out. You can watch the bizarre promo trailer here and check out our gallery.

Poor Valve, it just can't catch a break. At this year's E3, it revealed what should have been one of the more pleasant surprises of the show in Left 4 Dead 2, only to have a bunch of angry folks cry "boycott." Then, it put out box art for the game, only to have the ESRB flip out over something as silly as two chewed-off fingers.

As you can see above, Valve had to dial the gore back, with the two offending fingers now bent back. Oddly enough, there were no issues with the thumb, which makes us think the ESRB is composed of a bunch of Steve Oedekerk haters.

After being potentially canceled as of a few months ago, Gauntlet DS has re-emerged from purgatory with a new publisher in Majesco. At very least, that's our best guess based on an ESRB rating for the game found by a Gauntlet-lovin' GoNintendo reader.

Once announced as being developed by Backbone Entertainment and published by now Square Enix-owned Eidos, the title was delisted from GameStop's website as well as Amazon back in February. Does this mean we'll finally be able to try our very best not to shoot food on the DS in the near future? One can only dream.

Although it was announced a couple weeks ago (we were busy), we finally got a chance to the see the ESRB and Boston mayor Thomas Menino's "public education campaign" about the video game rating system on the side of Beantown buses. Like Mayor Menino, we also totally "suit up" before we sit down for an afternoon of gaming with the local neighborhood children. There are also local radio and television ads.

The campaign is likely part of Menino's continuing penance for making some ill-advised moves against the games industry and hooking up with Jack Thompson to do so. The state of Massachusetts is currently attempting to pass incentives to grow its stable of major developers and turn the city into the East Coast hub of game development.

The ESRB has revealed a list of games that could appear on the PSN soon. All six games (as detailed in the image above) are PS1 titles that have yet to appear on the PlayStation Store.

Are these the games Sony's John Koller was talking about when he said PSN was to receive more from the classics library? This list may not be the ultimate, but it's a start. With the mention of this, and Resident Evil having been loaded onto PSN yesterday, it looks like SCEA is fulfilling its promise of more PS1 classics.

Here's some further information on the six titles:

• Contra: Legacy of War - top-down version of classic Contra shooting action
  
• Dead in the Water - Think Twisted Metal ... on water
  
• Ford Racing - Hmm, we think it may have something to do with racing
  
• Mobile Light Force - Vertical-scrolling shmup
  
• Spec Ops: Airborne Commando - More shooting action
  
• XS Junior League Soccer - Soccer!

As it has in the past (accidentally so, we assume), the ESRB has leaked details for upcoming as yet unannounced titles. This time, the ESRB has trickled out details for two games -- both titled Star Wars Battlefront: Elite Squadron -- for the Nintendo DS and PSP, Kotaku reports.

According to product descriptions for each title, the games are presented in third-person and showcases battles throughout the Star Wars universe; in space, on land and in the air. Whether Elite Squadron is related to the Star Wars: Battlefront 3 title (formerly in development at Free Radical) remains to be seen.

Full product descriptions can be found after the break. Joystiq has contacted LucasArts for a comment regarding the listings.

Gameloft's mobile racing games Asphalt: Urban GT and Asphalt 2 were both released as retail DS cartridges back in 2004 and 2006, respectively. The fourth game in the series, Asphalt 4: Elite Racing, appears to be releasing as a downloadable game like its cell phone counterpart, thanks to the advent of DSiWare.

The ESRB has added a rating for Asphalt 4 for DSi. It'll join Gameloft's lineup of DSi games including Real Football 2009, American Popstar, and Uno. Whether you like the Asphalt games or not, we doubt anyone can deny it's better to buy them from home and pay less for them.

By his own account, Platinum Games modeler Kenichiro "Yoshi" Yoshimura poured in just the right amount of "blood and sweat" into the Bayonetta character model (sparing his tears, apparently). The end result has been described by the ESRB as "suggestive," contributing to the game's M-rating (of course, let's not overlook the part that "torture attacks," impaling, decapitating, dismembering, and demonic summoning play in that rating too). Specifically, Yoshi paid particular attention to perfecting Bayonetta's "backside," which, along with her breasts, can be ogled (or snickered at) during brief, in-game exposure -- oddly, in the midst of battle, according to the ESRB. "I guess I am into that sort of thing," Yoshi observes of his posterior fixation.

While popular culture long ago OD'ed on anatomically eye-popping fabrications ("there are people actually proportioned like Bayonetta" ... just not any of us), video games have been traditionally confined to more adolescent incarnations of this theme, tiptoeing into the "adult" world every now and then. But if everything else is "jiggling" and "gyrating" and spreading its legs in our faces, shouldn't we allow games to taunt us too? Wait. Don't answer that. Answer this: Do we really want them to?

Tecmo's Atsui 12 Game Furi Furi Party was initially revealed at TGS as a barebones WiiWare game that did nothing but score players based on the speed of their waggling. When it was released in Japan late last month, it appeared to be much more full-featured, with multiple modes and, you know, graphics.

We'll have our chance to experience the Furi Furi Party in the future! The ESRB has posted a rating for a Tecmo Wii game called 3-2-1 Rattle Battle. Rattle Battle! It's pretty catchy.

In other ESRB news, two more Commodore 64 games have been rated for release on the Wii: Impossible Mission and Boulder Dash.

[Via Siliconera]

The DSi category of the ESRB's database is currently pretty small, containing only eight games, including some of the current first-party DSiWare (not all of the existing games are visible yet), a few Gameloft games (Brain Challenge, Real Soccer 2009, American Popstar Road to Celebrity), and ... three Atari games. Specifically, Ghostbusters, N+, and The Chase: Felix Meets Felicity, all of which are now listed as both DS and DSi games.

These are the only games in the whole database to have such a distinction -- and the only DSi-listed games that aren't downloads. Unless they are!

We don't want to be rumormongers, and we don't want to jump to conclusions, so we'll lay out the possibilities that have occurred to us, from most exciting to least exciting:

1. Atari is planning to digitally distribute DS games via DSiWare, starting with Ghostbusters and extending into its back catalog.
2. The publisher will release special DSi-enhanced cartridge versions of the games.
3. The updated listings are a mistake.

Atari PR had the following to say in response: "Unfortunately, no official word from Atari. We'll let this stay a rumor for now ;)"

Cinema Blend reports that an Xbox 360 version of Sega's classic arcade game, Shinobi, has popped up in the ESRB database. Based on the ESRB description, it sounds like it will be an XBLA rerelease of the original arcade game (right down to the shuriken throwing mini-game). There have been some great Sega titles announced for the service lately -- namely Outrun Online Arcade and Virtual On: Oratorio Tangram -- as well as rumblings of more classics on the way, so the news isn't exactly surprising, but welcome.

Another reason it's not surprising: Sega needs the money.

The beginning of this trailer for The Conduit reveals the answer to one of the biggest questions surrounding High Voltage's FPS: the ESRB rating. Yes, that was one of the biggest questions surrounding The Conduit, along with the identity of the publisher. It's controversial and kind of mundane at the same time!

Of course, with The Conduit, we understand the concerns about the ESRB rating. The Conduit is labeled T, which may be a disappointment to those of you hoping for a nonstop bloody mess -- or a relief to those of you fearing sleeping gas and Nerf guns.

This trailer demonstrates the "All Seeing Eye," the item that deciphers alien writing, interfaces with computers, and pretty much seems to do everything. We're going to call it the "Plot Device."