Joystiq [Nintendo]

Boss Bass

In case you somehow don't know anything about this maritime monster (in which case we'll go ahead and ask what the H-E-double-hockey-sticks you were doing in the early 90s (or this very second!) that kept you from playing Super Mario Bros. 3--and don't tell us you were too busy listening to Bush and watching reruns of Fraggle Rock, because, trust us, we were doing the same things and still managed to inhabit our NES like it was a religious temple), Boss Bass is the ultra-aggressive fish policing the surface water whose pastimes include swimming fast and swallowing Mario whole.

An identical enemy can also be found in the underwater levels accompanied by a small school of offspring who take refuge in the larger fish's (possibly mother's) mouth. Both fish are intimidating in size, but Boss Bass is especially no joke. Hit him with fireballs and he comes back within seconds. Too bad Mario couldn't lob an oxygen tank in his mouth and take pop shots with a rifle until it blows up a la Jaws. Maybe the ESRB wouldn't allow it.

04/08/08