Egads: Text chat not actually in Mario Kart
by Candace Savino 
{ Feb 28th 2008 at 3:30AM }
First, we pondered amongst friends about the possibility of voice chat in the upcoming racer. When we found out that this wasn't happening, it was no biggie -- while some of you, we're sure, screamed in anguish to the heavens, most of us (being the realists that we are) never actually expected such a feature in the first place.
All hope was not lost, though. Praying to the Nintendo gods, we begged for some way of communicating with friends, so that our online matches would be deeper than normal matches against the computer. After all, what's the point of online play in the first place if it doesn't feel human? Our pleas did not go unnoticed, though, and Nintendo announced text chat support for the game.
The system wouldn't be perfect. There would be no text chatting during matches (not that we'd be able to physically pull that off in the first place, having only two hands and all). However, even being given the ability to create chat rooms to talk with our opponents was something.In the end, though, we were misled. Apparently, Nintendo's definition of "text chat" is a lot different than ours. It doesn't involve "chatting," per say, so much as "choosing from a list of Nintendo's pre-determined phrases." Sounds fun, doesn't it?!? If by "fun," of course, you mean "nauseating" and "I'd rather facepalm myself, thank you very much." Oh, and in case you were wondering, there won't be a keyboard peripheral with the game -- you don't exactly need one to choose phrases like "Good luck!" and "Oh gee, this is fun!" from a list.
Egads? More like Egaggingallovermyself, amirite? And if Nintendo's primitive ways aren't enough to bother you, that last "pun" of ours surely will be.
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Kyle Saver @ Feb 28th 2008 3:43AM
Im sorry nintendo but sometimes you really piss me off....
I may not buy this game now...=(
Sonic_13 @ Feb 28th 2008 4:27AM
You know you will...
John Rios @ Feb 28th 2008 10:54AM
Becaue of textchat? Seriously, man.
Just_a_guy @ Feb 28th 2008 3:54AM
when will you wake up and smell the roses nintendo. All you have to do to make us pleased is to give chat to those you have on your friend list.....
Anticrawl @ Feb 28th 2008 4:05AM
How hard could it be to have parental controls restricting chat of voice or text variety or just keep it for friends only? I don't see what the issue with those is if Nintendo is worried about pedo-bears. You can send messages/emails to your Wii friends so what is wrong with allowing them to do so in game? How can one possibly make friends without communicating with them? Why even have a friends system? Why don't we just stay the nameless, faceless group of online folk that we already are?
So many questions, so little answers to said obvious questions.
Anaris82 @ Feb 28th 2008 4:25AM
Just be glad there's an online feature. Question.. What's with the bear? Please tell me you guys see the bear.. do you? Guys?
Anticrawl @ Feb 28th 2008 4:31AM
That would probably be the pedobear I was referencing.
4chan.org
or you can go to the fake wikipedia site made by 4chan and look up all about said bear.
Just_a_guy @ Feb 28th 2008 4:54AM
don't remind me of the pedobear.........
clif @ Feb 28th 2008 4:31AM
It's called Pedobear for the 4chan fourms. He's into little kids.
I dunno what this means??!!?! I just found out what "it" from my wife oh boy!
Anticrawl @ Feb 28th 2008 4:32AM
You should really look into that whole "my wife visits 4chan" issue. It could be a great thing for you though, the whole freaky kink thing could spark the passion in a relationship.................................... or you could end up fleeing in horror.
Anaris82 @ Feb 28th 2008 5:16AM
So Pedobear is the opposite of Sexual Harassment Panda, gotcha.
koehler83 @ Feb 28th 2008 5:26AM
You realize this is totally Fox News' fault for their Pictochat tirade. Oh yes. I blame Fox News for everything.
David @ Feb 28th 2008 5:49AM
Fox news? They are not to blame I blame Brass Eye
http://youtube.com/watch?v=y7jVnrfoZD8
But im not at all shocked or surprised that they have done this, Im just hoping that it wont cost us extra dosh to play Mario Kart online
http://digitalspy.com/gaming/a90224/nintendo-to-introduce-online-charges.html
Boo you Nintendo sometimes. But as long as Yoshi is still in the lineup I will be buying this straight away in the safety of knowing that no one will know about the tiraid of abuse I seem to enjoy throwing at the screen whilst playing.
http://www.yourfaceisanadvert.com/?cat=7
Feigr @ Feb 28th 2008 6:08AM
Why is Nintendo so damn inept at the online? Do they want it to be like this or do they just don't understand what people want?
I'm not certainly not one to accuse Nintendo of being "kiddy", but the decisions they have made for their online services in the games pretty much falls under that category.
Not even allowing something as basic as voice chat with registered friends is just sad.
Spekkio @ Feb 28th 2008 6:16AM
Has anyone *asked* Nintendo about their online strategy? Has anyone asked them about the rationale for these disappointing decisions?
I dunno - it just seems like something that some credentialed journalist should grill them on. The arguments about the Wii's parental control system and the friend list are very strong, and I'd love to hear what Nintendo PR has to say on the matter.
Kye Wii60DF @ Feb 28th 2008 8:25AM
It...
It looks like Nintendo is getting raped...
By themselves.
Oh the horrow.
Good_Bytes @ Feb 28th 2008 9:08AM
Some sort of petition should be made!
nintendo1889 @ Feb 28th 2008 9:10AM
Uhhh...what were those videos for again...? Anyways, Mario Kart looks pretty cool despite limited chat features. I just hope the AI doesn't use stupid cheap shots right as I hit the finish line...
Dash @ Feb 28th 2008 9:11AM
It's a question I made a million times, but still have no answer: Why does some Nintendo-made DS games HAVE FULL VOICE CHAT, but most don't.
Pokemon Pearl/Diamond has full voice chat. It needs friend codes, sure, but after that you're done. I mean, there's even an official Nintendo Headset. Hell, METROID, the game I didn't expect to have any multiplayer at all, has Voice Chat.
So, why does some games do, and some don't? Can anyone tell? Or only time (or an angry fired former Nintendo exec) will tell?
Ps: But yeah, I'll buy the game anyway. Still looks great. And when I think about it, I don't talk while gaming (mostly because of the whiners in Team Fortress 2)
BrandonIT @ Feb 28th 2008 9:22AM
This is absolutely stupid on Nintendo's part. I just don't understand it. Maybe it's perceived bandwidth limitations, maybe they take a lot of stock in their "kid-friendly" reputation in the States. Whatever. Somebody needs to go over to Nintendo's corporate headquarters and slap them. Hard.
Mr Khan @ Feb 28th 2008 2:30PM
Bandwidth limitations? No. DS can do it and more. PSO could do it and more on dial-up
Matt @ Feb 28th 2008 9:50AM
Did you not see this coming when Brawl pretty much announced the same system? I wish I could say I didn't expect it (or more importantly that it isn't true) but I can't.
I hate Nintendo's online policy. It's the one major problem I have so far with Nintendo. But it's significant, which made me buy a PS3 in addition. Now I play online games on PS3 more than I play my Wii. Brawl is going to have to make a significant run if it wants to dethrone Call of Duty 4, Unreal Tournament 3, and Warhawk: Omega Dawn...
Jonathan Tran @ Feb 28th 2008 11:19AM
At least in Brawl you can write your OWN pre-set messages.
White Rose Duelist @ Feb 28th 2008 11:09AM
Does this mean no more user icons which are crude drawings of penises? I'm sure I saw a dozen of them on Mario Kart DS.
SnesR0X @ Feb 28th 2008 11:16AM
This system carries an amazing supply of FAIL
Mr Khan @ Feb 28th 2008 2:25PM
I suppose real chat of any kind in a first-party Wii game was a bit too much to ask for.
And here i thought they were making some sort of progress. Guess not...
Nathew @ Feb 28th 2008 2:41PM
running bear likes to run.
theboy @ Feb 28th 2008 2:59PM
Nintendo's online "strategy" is comprised mainly of ignorance, paranoia, and fail. I really loved the wii in the beginning, but it seems with every announcement from nintendo I am getting more and more alienated (and pissed off) at how they're handling this thing. I REALLY HATE and would previously deny it vehemently but I really feel like they're treating ALL consumers like they're 5 years old.
Jeff @ Feb 28th 2008 4:20PM
this is pretty lame, but then again, i'll probably just play with my friends, and maybe i'll just use iChat or Skype or something.
(text chat would be lame anyway... especially with an on-screen keyboard. yuck.)
Nebinator @ Feb 28th 2008 4:52PM
I blame Bowser!!!
Jammie @ Feb 29th 2008 7:00PM
Wtf Nintendo, sending predetermined messages, that aint text text chat. we are not small children, why can I talk 2 my friends wen I play pokemon on my £99 DS BUT not on my £210 Wii, Nintendo really need to wake up and smell the coffee, WE WANT HALF DECENT ONLINE CAPABILITIES I.E FULL TEXT CHAT U KNOW WHERE THERE THE WONDERFULL INVENTION CALLER THE QWERTY KEYBOARD ANYBODY EVER HEARD OF ONE OF THOES, AND AT LEAST SOME FORM OF VOICE CHAT, the wii already has Bluetooth so when u think about it shudnt b that hard. Come on Nintendo cut the kiddie **** that’s up to parents what kids. Other gamers don’t need it were not 7.
Rant over.
Ghen @ Feb 28th 2008 10:03PM
I won't buy it because I don't like mario cart anyway, but Nintendo's stand is seriously extreme. Its not their call to put boundries on entertainment, thats the parents.
Now, instead of allowing voice or text chat among people who trade friend numbers gamers will continue to rely on computer solutions like anonymous chat rooms (where all the slimeballs lurk anyway) and ventrillo servers.
BDR @ Feb 29th 2008 5:44AM
I'm almost certain that this "pay-to-play" service coming out will provide voice chat features. It would be a massive middle finger to Nintendo fans, and I beg them not to do it.