Taking a love for Birdo too far

by David Hinkle { Feb 27th 2008 at 10:30PM }

We imagine the above individual's diary entry for today would look something like this:

Dear diary,

Well, I finally decided to take my love of Birdo to the next level. Today, I finished creating my life's greatest achievement. I've attached a picture sample of the Birdo costume I created. You, like, totally know I'm all about Birdo. How many of your page's margins are full of hearts and little Birdo faces? Too many to count!

I figured with the costume, I could find my soulmate. So I created a myspace account (Birdo-missive57821) to find the perfect mate. They have to be tall, love Super Mario Bros. 2 (especially Birdo, lol) and enjoy listening to Marilyn Manson while pouring hot wax all over themselves. I think this costume I made will really help me find the right person to spend the rest of my life with. Someone who will respect me for the unique and talented person I am.

Anywho, I have to go, Courtney is coming over so we can both listen to some Savage Garden and give each other hickeys with the vacuum cleaner. You know, to impress the boys in gym class.

xoxoxoxoxo
Taylor

Tags: birdo, sick-people-on-the-internet, very-sick-people-on-the-internet, weirdos

Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)

Nar57981 @ Feb 27th 2008 10:55PM

Wasn't there something about the original Japanese instruction guide saying Birdo was a man? (I watch too much X-Play)

PaperMario480 @ Feb 27th 2008 11:00PM

Birdo is a guy who likes to dress up as a girl, yes, according to the instruction manual.

This is... deeply disturbing for me.

WaffleTehNut @ Feb 27th 2008 11:03PM

Oh my gosh... that is really creepy.

*rubs alcohol on her eyes*

Shadow31 @ Feb 27th 2008 11:03PM

...I'm boiling my eyes now...

Thank you, NWFB, for another painful, scarring memory. Sometimes I wonder why I actually visit here every day...

David Hinkle @ Feb 27th 2008 11:29PM

Because you secretly like the pain? Oh no, you're a Birdo-missive, too?

Sonic_13 @ Feb 27th 2008 11:03PM

Nightmare in the Mushroom Kingdom

Mountain lion link @ Feb 27th 2008 11:13PM

Latex outfit = hot
Latex outfit of Birdo = made me die inside, just a tiny bit

Author X @ Feb 27th 2008 11:20PM

...you seem to assume the person inside the outfit is female.

David Hinkle @ Feb 27th 2008 11:30PM

I like to think it's a girl in junior high school with real self-esteem and identity issues. Also, someone who likes to have their journal entries featured on a gaming blog.

Author X @ Feb 28th 2008 2:09AM

Y'know, you're right, I would like to believe that too... it's a lot more pleasant than a myriad of other possibilities. So I guess I'll go with that explanation as well.

Player1 @ Feb 28th 2008 10:34AM

Someone who likes to have their journal entries featured on a gaming blog? It must be someone from Kotaku.

Perverted @ Feb 27th 2008 11:39PM

My eyes!! They burnnnnn!!!!

My pervert sense is tingling.....I say it's a man...
And why no 18+ only sticker? You've now just scarred the next generation of kids with this *explicit deleted*

hvnlysoldr @ Mar 1st 2008 11:30PM

Ze goggles zey do nothing! Also irony for you saying it's disgusting.

hanke @ Feb 28th 2008 12:11AM

Oh yeah, that's definitely a dude in there.

BlackDogAssault @ Feb 28th 2008 12:19AM

Birdo... pin-up?
This is too much. The person who did it deserves DEATH. This person can't be normal. It's obvious that, however it is, it's gona use that costume in serial murders.

Normalbobsmith @ Mar 6th 2008 7:53PM

Normal? Death?

Let me tell you something about normal. Normal only counts in medical tests. Normal is multiple, therefore it is redundant, therefore normal people are expendable. By their normal nature normal people deserve death, not because they did anything wrong (they never did much of anything at all) but for the fact that if a normal person is destroyed there are many, many more carefully stored in mediocrity. They can be replaced like light bulbs. Is there some hidden joy in saying "I can swap my entire life with millions of people and the difference would be negligible."?

There's nothing more pathetic than people who seek normality. Normality is achieved by no doing anything different or special. I suspect anyone who tries to be normal of seeks normal things of hiding a terrible darkness inside them. Normal comes when you don't try or don't seek. The pursuit of normal causes a great deal of pain.

Example: Some women look for "that special someone" and "a perfectly normal guy". This is irrational. Special things are never perfectly normal. Choose one or face heartbreak.

Other things that are not normal include: awesome things, memorable things, interesting things, odd things, new things, exceptional things and once-in-a-lifetime things.

People don't recognize the triad of weird/stupid/dangerous. Birdo here is pretty weird and stupid, but not dangerous. That means it's amusing and possibly fun. It's the stupid, dangerous things that are not weird at all, that are everyday, commonplace, normal behavior that frighten me. If you walk out in public with the right kind of eyes you can see ten of them on any given day.

So, weirdo in the vinyl and/or latex Birdo suit: I salute you!