Japanese hardware sales, 21 August - 27 August: crazy-religious edition [Update 1]
by Jason Wishnov 
{ Sep 1st 2006 at 7:43PM }
Hear me now, o' brother and sisters! I want you to rise, come on, rise on up with me now! Today is a very special day, very special indeed! Can you feel it in the air, in your bodies and souls? Ladies and gentlemen, I see the Lite! I see it ascending, outlasting all others, filling you with sheer joy, come on now people, let me hear you now...amen, amen! Now, it's tough to resist the others sometimes, I know. But take a look at this!- DS Lite: 163,274
88,779 (119.17%)- PSP: 29,945
11,590 (27.90%)- PS2: 21,829
5,004 (18.65%)- GBA SP: 2,719
1,104 (28.88%)- Game Boy Micro: 1,819
447 (19.73%)- Xbox 360: 1,197
296 (19.83%)- Gamecube: 837
85 (9.22%)- DS Phat: 410
302 (42.42%)- GBA: 14
6 (30.00%)- Xbox: 12
5 (71.43%)It's so clear...the others are falling, faltering, but the one true king is still on high, still atop his mighty throne! Angels sing and hallelujah, I see the Lite! Amen!
[Update 1: Slightly altered the headline, to completely remove any direct references to any specific faith or faiths among our readers. Still, this is meant to be solely for entertainment purposes, so please don't read into it.]
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
sinergy @ Sep 1st 2006 8:52PM
Them nintendo top-dogs must be rolling around in a big room full of cash.
Jedite @ Sep 1st 2006 8:59PM
I own a DS Lite & think it's great and all that it's doing so well, but why are you mocking my religion?
Jason Wishnov @ Sep 1st 2006 9:16PM
With a name like Jedite, can I assume you're a Jedi? ^^ Regardless of your religion, televangelists exist in numerous other faiths besides fundamentalist Christianity (if not nearly as popular), so I apologize for any misconstrued intent.
Shadow @ Sep 1st 2006 9:43PM
Don't worry about him, I thought it was funny. If you've read Farhrenheit 451 (butchered the spelling) you would understand that if we removed everything that offended someone all of our literature would be boring and lifeless.
So please feel free to write with no regard to politcal correctness in the future, it makes it much more interesting to read. ;)
-Shadow
Jedite @ Sep 1st 2006 9:50PM
I'm a Christian thanks Jason. Read this http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=Evangelist and this http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=televangelist please tell me the "numerous other faiths" who have televangelists ?
Jedite @ Sep 1st 2006 9:59PM
Shadow - politcal correctness to what extent? You have to draw a line somewhere right?
ldd @ Sep 1st 2006 10:16PM
YES, yes my brothers!!! talk about religion, yes!!
so NOBODY knows our secret...
(so nobody talks about the psp and the xbox falling...)
aside that, i think the intended 'sarcasm' of the article was a little too much 'explicit'....
(i mean, i would be offended if they did something like that with the pope or something...)
anyway, i guess it was nobody's intention to hurt any1....
Bipedal @ Sep 1st 2006 10:16PM
Hey jedite, piss off. Nobody wants to hear your bs here. If you're offended, get over it, while I enjoy the joke.
DownloadingData @ Sep 1st 2006 10:26PM
Definition: (especially in the US) the activity of preaching (= giving religious speeches) on television in order to persuade people to become Christians and give their money to religious organizations.
http://dictionary.cambridge.org/define.asp?key=81778&dict=CALD
So, "Jedite", in your opinion, chiristianity equates to televangelist(m)?
Marc @ Sep 1st 2006 11:28PM
All religion debates aside, I'd really like to meet the 12 idiots who bought an Xbox.
Jedite @ Sep 2nd 2006 1:42AM
DownloadingData - no, my opinion was that a televangelist is exclusive to Christianity.
Jedite @ Sep 2nd 2006 1:57AM
I really enjoy reading dsfanboy with all the info on my favorite handheld! I could just do without this snide “joke”.
Md @ Sep 2nd 2006 2:59AM
Sorry, but you have to be wound up pretty tight to be offended by that. There was nothing offensive about it, nor did it slur any religion.
Man, I can't imagine how many things must offend you on a daily basis.
BPMΩ @ Sep 2nd 2006 3:26AM
Hmm, I thought it was funny.
Then again, I'm Catholic, not Protestant. So... Yeah.
Regardless, this post (like all of the Japanese hardware/software sales posts are becoming) was meant to be satircal humor (because otherwise just listing the facts is boring).
Don't get your panties in a knot, is what I'm saying.
Kaiser Soze @ Sep 2nd 2006 4:59AM
Personally I am a Jedi Knight, and occasionally I run in to non believers. If so, I just kill them wavering my hand in the air. To you christians, or anybody else, do the same if some jerk makes a joke about the bible, Jesus, God, Dr. Phil, or anything else that might be offensive. Have a good day and may the Force be with you
Exo @ Sep 2nd 2006 6:06PM
Very easy to see that Jedite is a true christain, cause like jadeite, all christians have no sense of humor.
Crimson @ Sep 2nd 2006 7:56AM
Admin might want to take control of this somehow, I thought the joke was funny but then people say crap like Exo just did and it changes the subject from a (in my opinion) pretty funny and in good humor joke about televagelism to him/her saying that all Christians have no sense of humor, which does offend me.
Marc @ Sep 2nd 2006 4:01PM
"Hmm, I thought it was funny.
Then again, I'm Catholic, not Protestant. So... Yeah."
For the record, I'm Lutheran and I thought it was funny.
"Very easy to see that Jedite is a true christain, cause like jadeite, all christians have no sense of humor."
Hmm, now who told you that? Christians have a sense of humor (just look at how I view this joke). It's just the "overly religious" ones (like Jedite) that find this offensive.
r-deezy @ Sep 2nd 2006 2:59PM
I didn't get a chance to see what the original head line was (maybe 'religious' swapped with 'televangelist') but it seems like a silly thing to be offended about. I don't understand why people are soo insecure about their faith... DS Lite is the king of the (Japanese) world!!
NoBullet @ Sep 2nd 2006 4:42PM
I know this is a bit off topic but...DS is kicking ass!
You may continue your religion debate.
btboy500 @ Sep 2nd 2006 4:54PM
I don't see what's so offensive about the post. The most I could say would be a lighthearted bit about the the way some televangelists do things, and I'd be wary of linking Christianity to to that.
Exo @ Sep 2nd 2006 4:56PM
Why is the truth so offensive? Its pretty damn true though, you pick fun of any religion and they laugh with you, except christians, they get pissed and say they are either offended or that you are going to hell.
Well I guess scientology has no humor as wel, but I think thats more of a farce then a religion.
See religion jokes are ok, because religion is a choice, unlike what race you are, you are born what you are, and really have no choice in the matter.
Exo @ Sep 2nd 2006 6:08PM
um wth why did my other post pop up again
James @ Sep 4th 2006 10:50AM
Hey guys, First I must say I'm glad the DS is kicking butt and taking names later!!!! GO DS!
But now about this religious thing, I'm a Christian, Pentecostal(Probably didn't spell that right) as a matter of fact. So I hear lots of jokes about handleing snakes and stuff. Really this shouldn't offend you, it's not like they were seriously trying to crack on televanglists. If they were I might care, but since I'm sure they weren't who cares? Just thought I'd share that with you.
As a side note, I know lot's of Christians who have a great sense of humor...anyways game on
R0DJOh @ Sep 2nd 2006 7:39PM
Christians take everything too seriously. Geesh.
But anyway, YEY for the DS Lite!
Jedite @ Sep 2nd 2006 7:57PM
It seems I have no sense of humor, but it's only when religion becomes the brunt of the joke that I get offended. I guess I should thank the admins for the update... although it was the replacement of Jesus with the DS that was the offensive part! Don't worry though I'm over it now... I forgive you :)
"I don't mean to be a c**t" - Dawn Weiner
Jedite @ Sep 2nd 2006 8:05PM
"You pick fun of any religion and they laugh with you, except Christians" - Although I have more in common with Muslims then a secular humanist, do you not remember the Mohammed cartoon riots?